Stress/Fear.

"Everyday
I tell myself
not to fall in love...

But everyday
I find myself
falling a little more."

Blah... I don't know. I'm stuck. I can't seem to find the words/right words to finish any of my poems. I mean most of them look finished, but they don't feel like they should be. I don't understand.

I'm so scared right now, like maybe close to tears? This'll pass within the hour, but what my mom said to me earlier just makes me want to cry. I don't know why it hurt so much. I'm just really conflicted. I know she didn't mean to make it hurt... I'm pretty sure she doesn't know.

I think the only reason I'm freaking out right now is because of finals and biology. I have two tests/quizzes tomorrow. Bleh. I've been working so hard and straight A's would be nice. But when I asked my mom if I can hang with Nikki on Friday/tomorrow and she says me...

"I don't care if you hang out with your friends, but as soon as your grades go down and you get a B, I'm taking everything away... including hanging out with your friends."

It seems unfair, but at the same time it was to be expected and I completely understand what my mom is saying, but still it really freaked me out today...

I can't think straight.

My mind is all jumbled up.

I overthink. I underthink.

My brain hurts right now,

but not as much as my heart :/